Grades 4 and 5 Open Circle Parent Letters

This year our class is using the Open Circle Curriculum, a comprehensive social and emotional learning program that supports elementary school children in developing the skills needed to be good learners and to form healthy, positive relationships with people throughout their lives.

Twice each week during the whole school year, the class will meet in a circle for 15 to 30 minutes. Lesson topics will include being a good listener, including one another, cooperating, understanding feelings, teasing, recognizing differences among people, getting calm, problem solving, positive self-talk, and more. The goals of the lessons are to create a cooperative classroom environment and to give children the skills they need to solve interpersonal problems and to build positive relationships.

Sometimes your child will have a homework assignment from Open Circle that might require your participation. You can help your child develop the skills we are working on in Open Circle by discussing and practicing them at home. You might ask your child to tell you what we talked about in the last Open Circle.

You will receive Open Circle Updates periodically to keep you informed. They will include new vocabulary words and suggestions for some books that are related to Open Circle lesson topics. You might want to check one or two of these books out of the library to read with your child. For more information about the Open Circle Program, please visit our website at www.open-circle.org.

The Open Circle Curriculum was developed by the Open Circle Program at the Wellesley Centers for Women, Wellesley College, and is available for all elementary grades. At each grade level, the program addresses the same core concepts and skills in ways that are specifically designed to be developmentally appropriate for students at that age. All teachers who use Open Circle have received special training to implement the curriculum in their classrooms.

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Open Circle Letter #2: Creating Open Circle

and Setting Classroom Goals

Dear Family:

During our first Open Circle meetings, the class worked together to make a plan to get their chairs into a circle quickly, quietly, safely, and cooperatively. We form a circle so that everyone can see everyone else and be heard. We always leave one space open in case a new person or a visitor would like to join the circle. Everyone is welcome, and no one is ever left out. The Open Circle symbolizes the idea of an inclusive classroom community.

Students worked on getting to know each other’s names in one Open Circle. In order to be able to work well together, they need to know each other’s names and how to pronounce them correctly. Talk to your child about how he/she got his/her name, why it was chosen, and if it has any particular meaning or connection to other family members.

In another Open Circle, we discussed classroom goals and developed some classroom rules based on those goals. We learned that a goal is something a person tries to get, something to work toward, or how you want things to end up. Just like individual people, whole classrooms can have goals too. Ask your child to share with you some of our classroom goals. You might want to talk to your child about your own personal goals and your goals for your family.

We also made some rules that will help to keep our classroom safe, make it a place where students feel cared about, and make it a place where we can do our best learning. In addition, we added some important rules that are nonnegotiable. This means “no choice.” Students may ask to have these rules explained, and they may ask questions about them, but they cannot be changed. We also talked about situations where rules might need to be changed or new ones added. Ask your child to share with you some of the classroom rules that we developed and agreed to. Ask for an example of a nonnegotiable rule in our classroom. You might have a discussion with your child about the rules in your home — for mealtimes, bedtimes, and chores. Do you have any nonnegotiable rules at home? What are the consequences for breaking the rules at home? How are these rules different from the rules you had at home when you were your child’s age?

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Aliki. Painted Words; Spoken Memories: Marianthe’s Story. Greenwillow Books, 1998.
Through drawings and newly acquired English language skills, Marianthe is able to communicate her experiences and feelings to her new classmates.

§ Herrera, Juan Felipe. The Upside Down Boy. Children’s Book Press, 2000.
When a young boy enters a new school, he feels like his life has been turned upside down. Everything about the experience is strange because Juanito speaks Spanish and everyone in his new school speaks English.

§ Poole, Amy Lowry. The Ant and the Grasshopper. Holiday House, 2000.
This classic fable demonstrates the importance of sharing responsibilities in a community.

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Open Circle Letter #3: Listening

Dear Family:

In Open Circle, we have been getting to know each other better. In order for students to work together cooperatively and become friends, it is important for them to learn what they have in common with each other and how they differ. We played the “Stand Up/Sit Down” game to find out what we have in common, such as who plays a musical instrument, likes to play sports, speaks more than one language, or has gone to this school since kindergarten. We talked about the advantages of having a variety of friends and how people do not need to be exactly alike in order to be friends. Ask your child to tell you what he/she learned about what the students in the class have in common and what he/she has in common with other students. You might encourage your child to try to get to know someone in the class he/she does not know very well during recess or lunchtime and find out what they have in common.

We also talked in Open Circle about the traits of a good listener and practiced being a good listener. We generated a list of what a good listener in school looks like. A good listener sits still, sits up, looks at the person who is speaking, pays attention, asks questions, makes comments, and gives feedback to the speaker.

It is important to everyone in the class — students, teachers, and visitors — to be listened to when they speak. Ask your child to practice good listening while you speak. Then you practice good listening while your child speaks. Good listening is a very important lifelong skill, not only for children to develop but also for adults to learn and practice. You might want to encourage all members of your family to become good listeners. Be sure to compliment good listening at home when you observe it.

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Hoose, Phillip and Hannah. Hey, Little Ant. Tricycle Press, 1998.
Just as a boy is about to squash an ant, the ant speaks up and points out all the things ants and humans have in common.

§ Johnson, Angela. Just Like Josh Gibson. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, 2004.
A young girl’s grandmother tells about the day the boys let her play baseball with them and she smashed the ball just like her idol, Josh Gibson.

§ Polacco, Patricia. Mrs. Katz and Tush. Bantam Books, 1992.
An elderly woman and a young boy find a common bond that leads to friendship.

§ Rathmann, Peggy. Officer Buckle and Gloria. G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 1995.
Officer Buckle’s audience shows good listening skills, but only after he adds a clever dog to his assembly appearances.

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Open Circle Letter #4: Nonverbal communication

Dear Family:

In Open Circle recently, we talked about nonverbal signals. A nonverbal signal is a way of communicating without using words. We tried out some nonverbal signals that we already use, such as the signals for time out, speak up, and be quiet. We talked about why it might be helpful to have some nonverbal signals in the classroom that everyone agrees to and is clear about instead of using words. The class chose several nonverbal signals to use this year in the classroom. We also chose a nonverbal signal to use if the class got too noisy and out of control and talked about what each person might do to take responsibility for making the signal work. Ask your child to demonstrate the signals the class agreed to use this year. Ask your child to demonstrate some other nonverbal signals and have you guess what they mean. You and your child might want to notice and discuss nonverbal signals that you see depicted in newspapers, in magazines, or on television.

At another Open Circle meeting, we talked about giving and receiving compliments. A compliment is a statement that is true and describes something good about a person. We discussed the kinds of things we might compliment someone about: what the person does well, how the person treats others, what the person does to be helpful, a special trait that makes others feel good, or what the person does that shows special effort. Compliments make people feel special and appreciated, and they can help to improve the classroom atmosphere. Each student had a turn to give and receive a compliment from another student. We learned three things to remember about giving a compliment:

• It should be true.

• It should be specific.

• It should be positive.

We also learned how to respond to compliments in school. We should:

• Look at the person and smile.

• Say, “Thank you!”

At home, be sure to compliment your child often for doing something well, being thoughtful, or being helpful. If your child gives you a compliment, remember to look at him/her, smile, and say, “Thank you!”

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Burleigh, Robert. Home Run: The Story of Babe Ruth. Silver Whistle, 1998.
With poetic language and realistic illustrations, the author describes how Yankees player Babe Ruth hits one of his legendary home runs.

§ Friedrich, Elizabeth. Leah’s Pony. Boyds Mills Press, 1996.
To help her family survive tough economic circumstances, a young girl sells her pony so that her father can keep his tractor.

§ Krupinski, Loretta. Best Friends. Hyperion Books for Children, 1998.
A young girl gives up her doll so that it can be used to carry an urgent message to her friend who is part of the Nez Perce tribe.

§ Nye, Naomi Shihab. Sitti’s Secrets. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, 1994.
Mona travels to the Middle East to visit her grandmother. Since they speak different languages, they use nonverbal signals to communicate.

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Open Circle Letter #5: Inclusion

Dear Family:

Including one another was the topic of one of our Open Circle lessons recently. We talked about how it feels to be left out and how it feels to be part of a group that excludes someone. We also discussed why people exclude others and talked about situations when it might be necessary to not let someone be included. As children get older, they have stronger opinions about who they want to be their friends and how they behave toward each other. Yet it is important in a caring classroom community to find ways to include each other so that we can learn to live and work together. Perhaps you could share with your child a time when you were left out and how it made you feel. Ask your child if he/she or any of his/her friends have ever felt hurt or angry by being excluded. Encourage your child to try to find ways to include classmates who are being left out on the playground and in after-school activities.

In another Open Circle, we talked about cooperating, or working together to get something done. We discussed why it is important to cooperate, and we brainstormed some skills needed for cooperation, such as sharing, taking turns, listening, letting someone organize the activity, and making sure that everyone gets to take part. We also talked about what works against cooperation. Ask your child to name some times during the school day when he/she has cooperated to get something done. Ask him/her to think of some times at home when he/she has cooperated with family members to get something done. Discuss what was helpful and what worked against cooperation at home. Encourage your child to cooperate with his/her friends in activities and groups outside of school.

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read them with your child:

§ Bulla, Clyde Robert. Shoeshine Girl. HarperTrophy, 1989.
Determined to earn some money, 10-year-old Sarah Ida gets a job at a shoe shine stand and learns a great many things besides shining shoes.

§ Coy, John. Strong to the Hoop. Lee & Low Books, 1999.
When he first gets to the playground with his older brother, James can’t play basketball with the pickup team, because he is only 10. When an older player gets injured, James gets the call to play.

§ DiSalvo-Ryan, DyAnne. City Green. Morrow Junior Books, 1994.
Marcy and her neighbor mobilize a community effort to build a cooperative urban garden.

§ Estes, Eleanor. The Hundred Dresses. Harcourt, Inc., 1974.
Wanda Petronski is excluded by the popular girls at school.

§ Muth, Jon J. The Three Questions. Scholastic Press, 2002.
A young boy asks three questions about how to be a good person. The answers include being compassionate and cooperative at every opportunity.

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Open Circle Letter #6: Double D’s:

Recognizing when to tell a responsible adult

Dear Family:

Our recent Open Circle lessons have focused on helping students to understand the situations in school that require the immediate intervention of a teacher or another responsible adult. We learned to identify Double D’s. These are behaviors that are dangerous (someone might get hurt) or destructive (something might get broken, damaged or destroyed; or mean teasing or bullying). It is always important for a student to tell a teacher or other adult when they observe a Double D behavior in school. For example, Double D’s might include running across the street at recess to get a ball, climbing a tree on the playground, standing on a folding chair to reach a book in the classroom, throwing a baseball toward a window, writing in a textbook, or being part of a group of kids picking on another child day after day at recess.

We also talked about some ways students can deal with situations themselves when someone is annoying them and it is not a Double D situation. For example, another student might cut into line or make noises while others are working. Two steps for dealing with annoying behavior are:

• Describe the behavior that is annoying you and explain why it bothers you.

• Say what you want the other person to do.

Students were assured that they can always come to an adult for help if they cannot deal with a situation on their own.

At home, try to identify behaviors or situations in terms of Double D’s. Ask your child, “Is that a Double D?” If it is, compliment him/her on telling an adult. If it is not a Double D, help your child to follow the two steps listed above. You also might want to help your child identify responsible adults whom he/she could tell about a Double D behavior at places other than school and home.

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Brisson, Pat. The Summer My Father Was Ten. Boyds Mills Press, 1998.
What starts out as a harmless prank results in the destruction of someone’s treasured vegetable garden.

§ Bunting, Eve. Summer Wheels. Voyager Books, 1996.
The Bicycle Man fixes up old bicycles and lends them to youngsters in his neighborhood. One boy takes advantage of this arrangement, and this angers the other children who borrow bicycles regularly.

§ Dakos, Kalli. “Budging Line-ups.” If You’re Not Here, Please Raise Your Hand. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, 1990.

§ Shields, Carol Diggory. Almost Late to School: And More School Poems. Dutton Children’s Books, 2003.
A collection of poems that reflect the frustrations and challenges of being a student in elementary school.

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Open Circle Letter #7: Dealing with Teasing

Dear Family:

Dealing with teasing was the topic of a recent Open Circle lesson. We talked about what teasing is and the kind of teasing that goes on at school. We discussed how it feels to be teased and how you can tell whether teasing is okay with someone or is hurtful to them. Sometimes teasing can be a Double D (dangerous or destructive) behavior, such as when it involves hurtful ridicule or name-calling, when it happens over and over, or when people gang up on someone to tease. In these cases, students should ask an adult to intervene to help.

At home, have a conversation with your child about teasing. Tell him/her about times you have been teased. Was it okay with you, or did it make you feel bad? Ask your child if he/she has been teased. How did it make him/her feel? Ask if your child has ever heard teasing that was hurtful to someone. Discuss some ways to handle teasing. Encourage your child to be sensitive to the feelings of other children.

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Polacco, Patricia. Thank You, Mr. Falker. Philomel Books, 1998.
A student is teased because she can’t read. A sensitive teacher provides emotional and academic support to help Trisha regain her self-confidence.

§ Yashima, Taro. Crow Boy. Puffin Books, 1976.
A shy Japanese schoolboy is ignored or teased by his classmates until a sensitive teacher encourages him to display his special talents.

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Open Circle Letter #8: Discrimination

Dear Family:

In Open Circle recently, we talked about how to recognize discrimination. Discrimination occurs when we do not treat others fairly just because they belong to a particular group. In school, discrimination could include saying things that are disrespectful or mean, teasing or making jokes about a person, calling someone bad names, avoiding someone, leaving them out, ignoring them, refusing to help them, or hurting them physically — only because they belong to a particular group, look different, or speak differently. In our classroom, discrimination will not be tolerated. We are all part of the same classroom community. Everyone should be included and treated with respect.

At home, share with your child any discrimination that you or any of your family members or friends have experienced. How did it make you feel? Ask your child if he/she has even been discriminated against. Has he/she observed other people discriminating against someone? Encourage your child to never discriminate against other people and to speak up to stop discrimination when it occurs.

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Mitchell, Margaree King. Uncle Jed’s Barbershop. Simon & Schuster Books for Young Readers, 1993.
Jed and his niece endure the hardships imposed on them by segregation in the 1920’s.

§ Mochizuki, Ken. Baseball Saved Us. Lee & Low Books, 1993.
A Japanese-American family is sent to an internment camp during World War II, returns home, and has to deal with the mistrust and prejudice of their neighbors.

§ Woodson, Jacqueline. The Other Side. G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 2001.
Two girls forge a friendship despite the fears and prejudice of the adults around them.

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Open Circle Letter #9: Speaking Up

Dear Family:

Speaking up was the topic of a recent Open Circle lesson. In order to be able to express our ideas and opinions, it’s important to be able to speak up — not only in the classroom but also in other places and at times when no adults are nearby. We learned four important skills that help people to hear and understand what we say:

• Look at the group.

• Speak slowly.

• Speak clearly.

• Speak loudly enough.

We also discussed how to help a speaker feel comfortable and encouraged and how to be a confident, convincing speaker.

At home, ask your child to use good speaking-up skills to tell you about his/her day at school. Ask your child to use good listening skills while you tell him/her about your day. Encourage your child to always use both good speaking-up and good listening skills at home, in school, and in other places.

In another Open Circle, we talked about interviewing. An interview is a meeting or conversation in which one person gets information from another person. We talked about interviews we have seen or read. Good interview questions often begin with “why,” “how,” “when,” or “what” and are phrased to elicit more than a “yes” or “no” response. We practiced interviewing and learned that interviews help us to get to know someone better.

At home, you can reinforce the interviewing skills your child learned in Open Circle by asking your child to interview you. You can be yourself or you can pretend to be someone else, such as a famous person in the news, a historical figure, or a character in a book. Compliment your child for asking good interview questions, and ask what he/she learned from the interview.

Literature Connections

Here are some books that relate to the topics we discussed in Open Circle. You might want to check out one or two at the library and read with your child:

§ Gerstein, Mordicai. The Man Who Walked Between the Towers. Roaring Brook Press, 2003.
The story of Philippe Petit, a French street performer, who walked on a tightrope between the two towers of the World Trade Center in New York City.

§ Grimes, Nikki. Talkin’ About Bessie: The Story of Aviator Elizabeth Coleman. Orchard Books, 2002.
Various family members and acquaintances of Elizabeth Coleman talk about her many accomplishments, including becoming the first African- American pilot.

§ McCully, Emily Arnold. The Bobbin Girl. Dial Books for Young Readers, 1996.Judith, a young worker in a Lowell, Massachusetts, textile mill, uses her courage and her public-speaking skills to organize a workers’ strike.

§ Parks, Rosa, and Gregory Reed. Dear Mrs. Parks: A Dialogue with Today’s Youth. Lee & Low Books, 1996.
A collection of correspondence between Rosa Parks and children. The questions from young people are good examples of interview questions that would help people get to know Mrs. Parks better.

§ Pinkwater, Daniel Manus. The Big Orange Splot. Scholastic Inc., 1977.
Mr. Plumbean paints his house to look like his dreams and convinces all of his neighbors to do the same.

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Open Circle Letter #10: Understanding/Recognizing Body Language

Dear Family:

In a recent Open Circle, we talked about understanding feelings. Some feelings are comfortable, such as calm or happy. Other feelings can be uncomfortable, such as anger, fear, or sadness. We learned that all feelings are okay, but not all behavior generated by feelings is okay. Sometimes we might want to act out on our feelings, but we need to think about whether it’s okay to do what we feel like doing. It’s important to know how to manage our feelings.

At home, talk to your child about some ways he/she can deal with being angry, frustrated, or upset. Share with your child some times when you felt angry or upset. What did you do to manage your feelings? What else could you have done? Encourage your child to always think ahead before acting on feelings and determine whether or not his/her actions will be helpful or harmful to himself/herself or others.

Body language was the topic of another recent Open Circle lesson. Body language is a way of expressing feelings using our faces, bodies, or hands. People’s facial expressions, gestures, and other body language provide clues about how that person is feeling. We practiced using and understanding body language. Noticing other people’s body language can help us to understand how people are feeling even if they are not telling us with words.

Encourage your child to be aware of the body language of friends, parents, and teachers so that he/she can better understand how they are feeling.

Literature Connections

You might want to check out the following literature from the library to read with your child:

§ Frame, Jeron Ashford. Yesterday I Had the Blues. Tricycle Press, 2003.
Each member of a family has a different feeling, and the author describes the characters’ moods using colors. Brother has the “blues,” father has the “grays,” and mother has the “reds.”

§ Hubbard, Woodleigh Marx. Whoa Jealousy! G.P. Putnam’s Sons, 2002.
Jealousy, envy, greed, and rivalry are represented by various animals.

§ Raschka, Chris. Yo! Yes? Orchard Books, 1993.
Two boys communicate with few words and plenty of body language.

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Open Circle Letter #11: Being Calm

Dear Family:

In recent Open Circle meetings, we talked about being calm and getting calm when we feel upset. We described situations in which we feel very calm. When we are calm, specific changes happen in our bodies. Our hearts beat more slowly, and our blood pressure is lower. Our muscles are relaxed, and our breathing is slower and deeper. We also talked about what happens to our bodies when we’re not calm, such as when we are watching a scary movie. Sometimes at school and in other places, we need to get calm, such as before a test, during a performance, or in a tense game. We learned two calm breathing exercises that can help us to get calm. One is basic calm breathing:

• Breathe in slowly and deeply through your nose, filling your belly with air like a balloon.

• Breathe out slowly through your nose.

Here is a second calm breathing exercise:

• Breathe in slowly and deeply through your nose.

• As you breathe out, count down on each out-breath, starting with 10 and going down to 1.

It’s important to recognize the feelings and changes in our bodies that signal that we are getting upset or out of control. Sometimes taking even a few calm breaths can help us to get back in control.

At home, ask your child to teach you the two calm breathing exercises. Practice them together. Share with your child times when you have felt stressed out or out of control and could have used a calm breathing exercise. Ask your child to talk about times he/she might have needed to use one of the exercises to help get calm. Make a habit of using calm breathing yourself, and encourage your child to use one of the techniques whenever he/she needs to calm down. When we are breathing calmly, we are better able to think clearly, focus on what we’re doing, and learn.

Literature Connections

You might want to check out the following literature from the library to read with your child:

§ Khan, Rukhsana. Ruler of the Courtyard. Viking Children’s Books, 2003.
Saba is terrified by what she thinks is a snake. She has to calm down in order to think clearly enough to decide what to do.